Marriages of the Leaders of the LDS Church

Marriages of LDS Church Leaders
Here's some fun little stories about church leaders falling in love and meeting their spouses.

“I saw her first in Primary,” President Hinckley says with a laugh. “She gave a reading. I don’t know what it did to me, but I never forgot it. Then she grew older into a beautiful young woman, and I had the good sense to marry her.”

After that sunrise service, he saw a young woman coming out of a grove of trees. Not only was he struck by her beauty, but at that moment the words of President David O. McKay came to his mind: “If you meet a girl in whose presence you feel a desire … to do your best, … such a young woman is worthy of your love” (Gospel Ideals, Salt Lake City: Improvement Era, 1953, p. 459). “That was exactly how I felt as I saw Kathleen for the first time,” says Elder Eyring.

While trying to win over Harriet’s heart, Dieter F. Uchtdorf would frequently ride his bike to her house, hoping to give her a ride to a church function. She was usually unavailable, but Harriet’s mother would take the ride instead. “Actually, looking back,” he says, “I recognize that it doesn’t hurt at all to be on good terms with the mother of the girl of your dreams.”

Do Moms get a Day of Rest?

Sabbath for Mom - article link

The article in the link above is awesome. You've gotta read it. It encourages the dads to help more on Sunday. If you're a mom going through the first years of parenting, church and Sunday are as exhausting as any other day. It's just how it is. Hopefully the husband and wife can work out a routine that makes things smoother, but it'll require work from both parents. For, example, I can't even remember the last Mother's Day(Sunday) when I didn't have to change a baby's diaper. It's just how it is. There's a lot to be done.

That being said, Keeping the Sabbath Day Holy has been my favorite commandment for probably 13 years. When Ryan was going through school, it was easy for him to put in 60 to 80 hour work weeks (including studying and working). He was able to do all that in 6 days a week. The 7th day became the family day. On Sundays he would take the kids out during sacrament meeting when they screamed. That doesn't necessarily mean I heard much of sacrament meeting, because with multiple kids somebody always needs help. The gesture was needed and kind though. On Sundays he'd also take our baby to Elder's Quorum (the men's meeting). That left me free to teach primary.

He'd often cook dinner or lunch after church like I mentioned here.The times he had to stay after church for a calling, we often decided to stay too. I wasn't excited to go home and take care of the kids there by myself like any other day. So, I'd let the kids play in the nursery after church while we waited for him. I didn't get the day off, but it helped relax the heavy load that little kids bring for a mom.  Sunday was definitely a break from the routine.

If you do have a heavy load on Sundays because of  young children, just remember they grow up. Just for reference, I probably take my two year old out of sacrament meeting and into the hall about once or twice per meeting. The 5 year old only has to go out about once per year. The 8, 10 and 12 year olds sit through the meeting and even learn things.

Sundays for Togetherness

Sundays have made our marriage thrive through the busy years. See Ryan was in school for about the first 10 years of our marriage. We met and married during our undergraduate studies and then survived his master's and his PhD (still happily married). The whole time I chose to be a stay-at-home Mom raising the kids. So, I got plenty of time with the kids. Ryan didn't have a lot of time for the family. Since his schooling also paid his way, it owned him. He worked and worked and worked six days a week with little time to eat or sleep or spend with family. He really took to heart: "six days shalt Thou labor and do all thy work..." Sundays were different. On Sundays he didn't touch his studies. He chose to be home with us.

 Sundays are a great time to talk with family who live far away. We never really get to live by our family, but we always like to take advantage of Sundays to talk with them.

And lastly and so important, Sundays have always been a time for Ryan and I to catch up with each other.

Aprons and suits

Dad is in charge of food on weekends at our house, and Mom doesn't usually even go in the kitchen on Sunday. I (Dad) recently noticed a pattern on Sunday afternoons: when we get home from church, everyone is starving so I head straight into the kitchen, put on an apron over my suit, and start cooking. Usually we move on to making Sunday Treat once lunch is under control, and depending on how long that takes (the kids usually help) dinner might not be far away. The apron (and the suit) often stay with me until the kids go to bed.

At one point it occurred to me that I should feel strange wearing an apron over dress clothes, but it really doesn't bother me. Then I realized that my own Dad has been wearing an apron over his suit on Sunday afternoons for as long as I can remember, and Grandpa did the same. Rumor has it that the neighbors used to heckle Great Grandpa when he not only wore an apron but did it outdoors while hanging the laundry out to dry. "Hey Fred, you doin' woman's work again?" they'd ask. He'd just smile and shrug, then finish the job before heading back to the house, laundry basket in tow.

Looking back through our early photos, it seems I didn't start out with a proper apron.

It doesn't seem to have gotten in the way of Sunday cooking, though.

A few years after we married Leah made me an apron.

She even sewed a little heart on one corner.

I'm not sure how vital a man's apron has been to these four generations of marriages, but it definitely hasn't hurt. I'm sure Mom and two Grandmas appreciated the help just as much as my wife does. It also shows that the patterns we set can carry strongly through multiple generations and color the experience of descendants we won't even live to meet.